By Logan Love Powers
Did you know that dating online can be very safe as long as you stick to some basic rules. After 10 years and serving hundreds of thousands of South African singles, we came up with a list of things that will keep you safe when you date online. Taking these ideas seriously will ensure that you are always safe and protected when you date online.
Keep it anonymous for starters
Don’t give out your contact number too soon. In our modern Internet age, your phone number can be used to uncover a lot of personal information about you, like your address, social media profiles and even financial information. You would not want your number in the hands of someone who might harass or stalk you.
Take some time to get to know the other person that you are communicating with. A few days or even a few weeks of online communication before giving out a phone number is normal and not out of the ordinary. There is nothing wrong with taking your time to get to know someone online. It is going to take time to establish a reasonable level of trust with someone you may be interested in.
If someone starts asking for your life story five minutes after saying “Hi,” press your foot on the brakes. That’s not small talk, that’s data harvesting!
Refuse to give out your number if you spot any deal breakers or feel pressured by the other party in any way. There is no reason to think that it would be different in real life when you meet offline. Use the ‘Block’ functionality of our system to become invisible to the other party if you would like to end any contact permanently.
Non-negotiable deal breakers
Cut off contact if you are asked for money or airtime immediately. Use the ‘Block’ functionality of our system to become invisible to the other party and use the ‘Report Abuse’ function to let us know that you have been asked for money. We record the abuse reports received for each profile and if a profile receives a certain amount of abuse reports, the account gets suspended or blocked. We have anti-fraud systems in place that have been developed and refined for over a decade.
Never send money to someone you meet online, no matter the reason. There is not a valid enough reason on this earth to give money to someone you don’t know and have never seen before on a dating site. If you’re not yet married, there is absolutely no plausible reason to give someone money. It is not possible to get scammed if you don’t send or give people money. Make it an unbreakable rule never to send money to anyone you meet on a dating site.
Always keep in mind that you can end communication with anybody and become invisible to them by using the ‘Block’ function of our dating system.
Mind your own personal safety and belongings when meeting in real life
Don’t pick a secret spot in the middle of nowhere. You want to meet somewhere crowded, bright and full of other humans – think coffee shop vibes or a bustling restaurant.
Tell someone what your whereabouts will be. No, you’re not being paranoid – you’re absolutely being smart. Shoot a quick text to a friend or family member with the who, where, and when.
Bring a sidekick (optional, but legendary). Worried about awkward silences or just want backup? Invite a buddy along for moral support. It takes the edge off the whole ordeal.
Use your own transport. Get yourself there and back. That means no ride-sharing with your date, no matter how charming they seem. Keep your address off the table for now. Mysterious is cool. Safe is cooler.
Watch your personal belongings and keep your phone close to you on the date. Never abandon your drink or meal.
Meeting someone new should be fun, not nerve-wracking. So go ahead and enjoy the moment, but bring your street smarts along for the ride.
Here’s a little nugget of wisdom to tuck in your pocket before you go: stay sober. Yep. Stone-cold, sparkling-water sober. At least for now.
Why? Because love might be blind, but your judgment shouldn’t be.
You’ll want your brain firing on all cylinders when you’re getting to know someone. Is this person a gem or just really good at quoting rom-coms? That’s hard to tell after two cocktails and a tequila shot. Your gut’s got decent Wi-Fi – trust it. If something feels off, it probably is off.
And if it ever gets weird? Leave. Ghost the date, not your comfort. You’re not being rude – you’re being the CEO of your own well-being. Bottom line: clear head, clear heart. Plus, you remember everything the next day, including that super weird thing they said about their pet lizard’s diet.